In this special Pride Month interview, we had the privilege of speaking with incredibly open, enthusiastic, and genuinely exceptional Jove Meyer, a visionary of joy and an esteemed wedding planner based in New York City. Jove is not only known for his outstanding design skills and reputation as a top wedding planner, but he is also a dedicated LGBTQ+ activist and speaker.
With a deep commitment to celebrating diversity, empowering marginalized communities, and advocating for equality, Jove’s work has garnered recognition from renowned wedding blogs and industry experts, including Martha Stewart herself, and then extended far beyond the world of weddings.
Join us as we explore Jove’s inspiring approach and insights on LGBTQ+ weddings, inclusivity in the planning and design process, the significance of Pride, and heartwarming moments from the weddings he has been a part of.
How do you approach LGBTQ+ weddings and ensure inclusivity in your planning and design process?
As we do with all of our weddings we do not assume things about our couples, instead we take pride in asking questions to get to know them, their love story, relationship, style and personalities so we can infuse that into their wedding design. We prioritize love and do not tolerate hate, especially in the business of love. To ensure we are working with vendors who are inclusive and supportive of marriage equality we ask that each one read, review and sign our ally pledge. Furthermore, we will only collaborate with creative partners who agree to be active allies, both online and off, and sign our Ally Pledge to choose love over hate.
Are there any LGBTQ+ wedding traditions or rituals that you often incorporate into your design, and why do you find them meaningful?
Since marriage equality is relatively new in the United States, only 8 years old, there are not long standing LGBTQ+ wedding traditions that are super common throughout the community. Instead I think LGBTQ+ couples are much more intentional about each of their decisions as they are in the process of creating new traditions that reflect their culture and love stories as they have only had heteronormative wedding traditions to look towards, and those were not created for us and are mainly rooted in religion which has often not been supportive or loving towards our community. I think planning your wedding with intention is super important for all couples, but LGBTQ+ couples seem to lead the way in this trend as we sort of have to.
What Pride means to you personally?
Pride means so many things to me, but ultimately it is a reminder of the many people who came before me and paved the way for the quality we have today. Pride began as a riot against unprovoked police brutality and hate, it was a response to being discriminated against for so many years, a response to hiding who people were, hiding their love, their personalities to please the straight majority. Pride was born out of being pushed down and aside by society for so many years, finally the queer community had enough and took to the streets to say we are here, we are queer and we are not going anywhere.
Pride means we still have work to do towards full equality for LGBTQ+ people, now more than ever with the more than 450 bills specifically targeted at us, especially the trans community, they are appalling bills that work to dehumanize us and it’s not ok, so we have to march, loud and proud!!!
What advice would you give to LGBTQ+ couples who are planning their wedding and want to make it a true reflection of their identities and love?
When planning your wedding you will feel outside pressures to do things and make decisions that may not be true to who you are or what you want. People mean well and will encourage you to do this or that, from parents to friends and even co-workers, they will put their expectations on you, and even though they mean well you have to listen to your voice, your heart and what makes you happy. Be intentional with each decision, hire who you want, who makes you happy and who cheers your love on!
Take wedding traditions and examine them, ask what they mean to you, if they resonate with you, if not do not do them, create your own instead. What you wear, what you eat, the length of your ceremony, who walks down the aisle with who, none of these things are linked to a successful marriage, so do what feels right to you and your fiance, not what you feel you have to do. This rings especially true with the guest list, do not give into the pressure to invite guests who are not 100% supportive and excited about your love and marriage, you do not deserve any negative or homophobic energy at your wedding, its all love or nothing at all!
Pride means we still have work to do towards full equality for LGBTQ+ people, now more than ever with the more than 450 bills specifically targeted at us, especially the trans community, they are appalling bills that work to dehumanize us and it’s not ok, so we have to march, loud and proud!!!
Can you share any heartwarming or memorable moments from LGBTQ+ weddings you have been a part of?
There are so many, honestly LGBTQ+ weddings are all heartwarming as statistics say we should not find love, be in love or get married, the world fought and is still fighting to make our love illegal, so each and every queer wedding is a miracle and I am so honored and lucky to be a part of them!
One of my favorite memories from a wedding with two grooms was their ceremony entrance. They felt that walking down the aisle was too traditional for them and did not feel like them, so instead we had the guests in the foyer with live music and bubbly and the grooms waited inside the ceremony space, together and we opened the doors and the guests walked down the aisle to the grooms, they surrounded them with love as they stood up front together watching everyone they know and love walk to them to support their union, it was so beautiful! These grooms also love Broadway, especially Wicked, so once the doors opened and the guests walked in we had the ceiling turn green and had two men sing “For Good” which is traditionally sung by two women. The song, the lights, the love in the room, there was not a dry eye in the house!!!
Photo: Edward Winter of Readyluck; Planner & Designer: Jove Meyer
